Morning has broken

It’s the tinge of light before day. It slides its way over the horizon, forcing apart the heavens of night. She wakes from her light sleep. Although her bonds are comfortable, she never sleeps deeply. She wants to be ready at any time, to respond to her Master’s wishes. She rolls onto her back and... Continue Reading →

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The slave within

The slave within me abhors freedom. She knows she cannot be free. She feels her existence as a free woman is a joke-it’s a character, a role she plays, it’s not really her. The slave within me is base. She knows she is an animal. She belongs on the floor at her Master’s feet. She... Continue Reading →

Caged

Seeing the six walls, the eight corners and one entry point I see Mecca. It’s my light and my darkness, my freedom and my confinement. It surrounds and fills me, covers me up and soothes me. It’s my place, my home, my cage. To feel the cool metal and know it cocoons me, is an... Continue Reading →

Butterflies

Not of the winged variety, but of the stomach-churning, want-to-pee-all-the-time-because-I’m-so-nervous-kind. Those are the type of butterflies I have when I think that this time two weeks from now I’ll be heading off on that big silver bird to Perth. I worry about starting a new life. I worry about whether Master will be pleased. I... Continue Reading →

Tearful

They say that everything is a learning process and I’m certainly feeling that the learning process has begun. I’ve always been attracted to rules and protocol-prescribed things to dice up and define my life. I’m systematic, like things organized and I become exceptionally stressed when things don’t have places. Staying at people’s places or sharing... Continue Reading →

Waiting

I woke early this morning-partly due to my relatively early night and partly from my bladder telling me to 'get up now!' It was about 6am (4am where Master is) and I knew Master was no-where close to getting up. So I waited and dozed...waited a bit more...dozed some more and my brain started to... Continue Reading →

Culling

I spent a little time looking through my clothes today, physically splitting them into two piles, “Casual slut toy” and “Other”. After I’d split them into piles I was both disappointed and relieved- I’ve got more “Other” than other! I’ve done a lot of lugging around of my life and every time I lug it... Continue Reading →

A cover makes the book

I've always bought books according to how much I like the covers-great colours, lovely pictures, anything with a nice cover became a part of my collection. Covers are just like clothes. Change the clothes and the person becomes richer, more attractive. I like to dress up- spend a couple of hours choosing clothes, doing make... Continue Reading →

My world

I feel the absence of presence I feel the hollow in my heart And I weep. I have no more life to give. The darkness greets me Embraces me, envelops me Conceals me from myself. I have no more breath to breathe. The emptiness engulfs me, eats me, Consumes my soul. I am dry. My... Continue Reading →

Eighty laps

I'm always amazed by what I can do when I put my mind to it. Things I've done, places I've been, sights I've seen....I think about them now and wonder "How did I do it?" It's amazing what you can do when you have purpose,a focus, a reason for being. I've never been good at... Continue Reading →

Bricks and rope

Something that you said to me a while ago Master, seems to be so relevant now and is stuck in my mind: "You don't teach a person to swim by tying a brick around their waist and throwing them in the deep end." I'm feeling a little now like I'm unable to float near the... Continue Reading →

In reply to a friend

I've always found discomfort hot. Being tied in positions where if you stretch it pulls on something (like hands cuffed behind back and attached with a chain to nipple clamps etc.) whippings/canings/floggings that welt and break the skin leaving trails of blood, having your mouth fucked until it's numb and spit covers your breasts, legs... Continue Reading →

The you in me

Show me the other side of your face. The one without a name That smiles in silence. It is the infinite you. In stillness you enfold upon yourself, Down into yourself, Becoming less than what you are. Fleshy walls conceal you. Not you from me, But you from you. I will give your face a... Continue Reading →

Changes

Things are never as they seem-they are usually quite different and I am no exception to the rule. I weave and twist from one emotion to another, falling in and out of mindsets and all the while on a subconscious level I am changing. Things are pulled from deep inside me. I watch and I... Continue Reading →

The vessel

A hideous satiety of pain and joy ought, one would have thought, to have edged her further and further along that gradually declining slope at whose lower depths are sleep and somnambulism. But to the contrary. The corset which held her upright, the chains which maintained her in subjection, silence, her sanctuary-perhaps these had something... Continue Reading →

Wet, wet, wet

It's such a warm, inviting space. My mind is foggy, half-asleep, content in that warm, inviting space. "You want to feel my collar in your clithood, don't you?" "Yes, Master." "You want to have your slave markings on your inner thigh so everyone who comes to use you knows exactly what you are, don't you?... Continue Reading →

If the collar fits…..

Lying in bed last night after a few too many drinks and a close encounter of the unfortunate acquaintance from high school kind, I was thinking how life changes so agonizingly slowly, yet so quickly and how you never really know what is going to happen from one instant to the next. When I looked... Continue Reading →

Away

Take me away. Take me far away. Tie me tight. The road is not my path. The shadows call me, wake me and come inside. I am not who I am. The warm breath is not mine. Me, I'm down below. I will not let it take me, I'm gone. I will not let it... Continue Reading →

Empathy

I had a very interesting conversation with a lovely gentleman who is exceptionally knowledgable about energy. Things started to click like why I always felt drained, why people always say they find me calming, why people tell me their deepest, darkest secrets. Apparently it's because I'm empathic. A lot of people tell me I’m intimidating... Continue Reading →

Without wanting to want

Can you "live" without "living"? Yes. Can you "die" without "dying"? Yes. "Want without wanting?" No. I did my first really hard session of retail therapy today. Clothes, a mobile phone, a pedometer...all things that I had wanted-not needed perhaps, but wanted nonetheless. I usually get what I want in some form or another, sooner... Continue Reading →

Too much, too little, too late

Destiny, fate, kharma or whatever you want to call it throws a spanner in the works sometimes… It was a voice that seemed full of confidence, fearless and smooth. Pristinely smooth like a super salesman able to make women swoon and causing wallets to be considerably lighter. “Hi, this is the xxx hotel….” “Hello there... Continue Reading →

Instinct

I was walking the dogs today and thinking how lucky they were. All done up in their little harnesses, given pats and encouraging words. I noticed they just kept enough pull in their leashes to feel that I was there. If I gave them too much slack they would stop and turn around, seemingly panicked... Continue Reading →

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