There’s yet another slave marking in the wind. Master is going to tattoo “Property of XXX” on my left ass cheek. His full name will be emblazoned on my butt. No doubt, no romance. A dispassionate marking of an animal that I won’t even get to see until it is done.
When he first told me that this was what he wanted, I baulked. I thought that once the ‘slave’ tattoo on my right flank and the piercings were done, it would be over. But he wanted more.
It’s not the pain or the aftercare of another tattoo that stressed me. It was the simple fact that this time, there would be no turning back. It wasn’t a ‘generic’ slave marking that could stay with me no matter who my owner, this was something that was ‘owner-specific’ and hammered home to me the gravity of the situation.
I felt that it was too soon to make such a ‘permanent’ addition to my body and worried about what would happen if we broke up. I was thinking purely as a vanilla girlfriend, worried about the relationship ending. But over time there has been a change in me. I’ve realised that there won’t be a ‘break up’, there won’t be an ending of the relationship and a dividing of the furniture. I’m a slave and that’s the way I’m going to stay- there’s no confusion there now.
I told Master about my worries before and how a tattoo saying ‘Property of XXX’ would lower my ‘re-sale value’ that it would make me less desirable for my new owner. His response was that it wouldn’t matter, and that my skin would be my passport showing my journey through slavery. What I was actually saying while I was making these objections was that the idea of being ‘indelibly’ marked as his property was scaring the crap out of me. It felt like I was being pushed into the ‘secret garden’ and the gate was being forcibly shut behind me.
I’m not sure when, but at some time I have came to accept that I would be marked, that Master would do to me as he wanted, and that worrying and angsting about it would alter absolutely nothing. It felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders as that realisation sunk in and it’s very liberating to know that ‘someone’ is control.
Originally Master was allowing me to have some input in the design process. I put forward a few ideas, but my heart really wasn’t in it. I didn’t really want it to be done, so my research was half-hearted. Then some time last week, he announced that he was going to choose the design and make the appointment. All I needed to do was to bare my bum at the appropriate time, everything else would be arranged.
The idea of that was intoxicating. The whole marking had changed from a “romantic couple joint idea” to an “enforced property marking of an animal”. No longer was I being marked by my lover, but by my owner and Master. The change in headspace was amazing. So much so that I find it hard to explain.
I think my ideas had been changing for sometime. I’d been adamant about not having it done when Master first announced it, and over the months he’s been chipping away at my resolve until he finally reached the core. The restraints and binds that I’d wrapped so tightly around what I wanted and what I thought was right, were stifling me. When Master presented me with his want, his decision, it truly was liberating.
Thank you Master.