Spot the tart

In the vein of Guess Her Muff introduced to me by the delightful Mr Upton Ogood , I’ve posted some pics so you can spot the tart.

Guess which picture shows the tart?

a)

corset

b)

leather pants

c)

tartiest lemon tart

d)

boobless top

And the answer is???

.

.

.

d) of course. Did you get it right?

I was trying on the options to wear to the play party next weekend and Master took a few snaps (as we know he always does…) so I thought I’d share. The leather pants were an ebay purchase Master made for me a looooong time ago and I’ve never been able to get them over my thunder thighs wear them previously, so it’s good to finally fit into them.

Interestingly enough, they have the zipper up the crack of my ass and when Master saw them on me for the first time, he enquired whether I ‘had them on the wrong way’. I was actually thinking that having the zipper in the crack of my ass was ‘the right way’…you know…easy access and all that stuff.

Of the two tops, obviously Master is favouring the boobs-in-your-face-tartiest-of-the-tart top and I’m favouring the cover-my-boobs-ever-so-slightly-warmer corset for the evening’s outfit.

Oh, I also made a lemon tart on Saturday afternoon which turned out browner than it should of been. (Note to self: don’t go and give Master some cuddlin’ time when there’s a tart a cookin’ in the oven.)

We had a flurry of activity in the kitchen yesterday with Master baking a bacon and leek pie and a blackberry jam roley poley (I didn’t know what it was, but apparently it’s pastry with jam spread on it, rolled up and baked until golden brown.) Smelling the divine aromas of buttery flaky pastry and sizzling bacon with leek for several hours almost made me want to start eating meat again.

Seriously.it.was.that.good.

For seventeen years I haven’t eaten red meat, but that pie almost tipped me over the edge. Then there was the buttery pastry and sugar smell wafting around after that…it was pure torture. I made the tart for Master and then cabbage rolls Japanese style for us for dinner.

After dinner I then again upheld my record for choosing the worst movies in history to watch by choosing The Three Burials of Melquiades Estrada.Normally I love Tommy Lee Jones, but it was just baaaaad. Also, the extent of my Spanish language knowledge is jalapeno and tortilla so the un-subtitled 1/3 of the movie in Spanish was frustrating. Yep, baaaaad and gross and there is nothing worse than a bad, frustrating and gross movie (except maybe looking at too many hairy muffs on Guess Her Muff…)

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3 thoughts on “Spot the tart

Add yours

  1. i love the corset but also like the *boobs-in-your-face-top* and the pants are a yummmmmm, almost makes me want to *lick* you 🙂

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