For hire

Classfied ad

So, you know how every guy who owns a chick wants to give/rent/loan them out to others? Well, my owner-type guy is no different. As you can see from my ad above though, I don’t think we’ll have the punters lined up outside the door.

I’m a whore with dubious whore skills.

We know a couple who fund their life by the chick turning tricks whenever they need some cash, so instead of trying to find myself a better paying job before we run out of money and become homeless, should I be honing my whore skills instead?

Truth be told, I’ve always had a bit of a romantic image of prostitutes. I would also say that my  20+ viewings of Pretty Woman helped me think that it’s not the worst profession in the world and there can be good things gotten out of it (although I wouldn’t want my white knight to be Richard Gere – he’s a short-ass with squinty eyes.)

I suppose the reality of having to service sweaty, smelly guys and scary women with crew cuts is not hawt, but the fantasy in my mind always is. In my fantasy, I’m more a high-class call girl loaned out to the rich and famous for dinner events and then taken back to their mansions for the night before being collected by my owner in the morning. I don’t get the cash and don’t even know my price, I’m just there as a play-toy for whoever can afford it.

I guess at $1/min I’m cheap. Or am I? How much does a prostitute charge these days? And how ‘good’ does she have to be? Does she need to be able to recite the karma sutra backwards, or is a warm hole or two or three enough for the undiscerning gentleman?

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8 thoughts on “For hire

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  1. lol I’m not sure if this is a clever photoshop moment but I have to admit, Master has “joked” about how He is going to get a return on His investment in me 😛 Ya know, since I can’t have a “legal” job till we’re married and all lol….at least I think/hope He’s joking??

    1. I believe this is a subtle-is-bored-and-is-messing-around-on-her-new-imac moment 🙂

      You don’t have a fantasy to be ‘sent out to work’? I’ve always had one, but of course, it’s a fantasy. I’m not sure how the reality would be.

  2. I know that in our old neighbourhood (charming as it was), a streetcorner whore offered the Captain a blow job for the change in his pocket. Unsurprisingly, he declined. So I guess by the incredibly low standards she set herself, being paid $1/min is probably a pretty good fare. Escorts around here typically charge about $200/hr, though.

    I’ve suggested turning tricks when money has been tight. The Captain finds that suggestion to be Not Amusing.

      1. Ha.

        No, he doesn’t want me all to own. He just doesn’t want me turning tricks for cash. He wants me to CHOOSE other sex partners and ENJOY it, but that’s a bitter little rant for another time.

  3. I’ve known several escorts, and if it’s a higher class agency, the job isn’t bad. One chick I knew…She didn’t sleep with anyone she didn’t want to (though she didn’t get paid either, and neither did the agency, so you could say the pressure was there.) She was awesome, though. She lived a good life, paid off college, and is now an OR nurse.

    1. Yeah, I think it would be okay if you could choose your clients and if you had a group of ‘nice’ regulars. I don’t know of anyone who does it because they enjoy it though. I mean, it’s always a means to an end isn’t it?

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