I’ve been a very bad kitten for several weeks now and it’s time to get my arse into gear. Thanks to a succession of binging episodes over xmas, new year and my birthday, I’ve re-gained 4 kilograms. Yay for me….
In the old days, 4kg was nothing and I could happily be ±10 kilos without me or anyone else noticing much of a differnce, but with four extra kilos now, I can really *feel* the difference. I feel chunky and unattractive and just generally…wrong.
So, with a little over eight weeks until Master and I depart for our trip to Japan, I’m embarking (again) on my 1200 calorie/day eating plan. Last week I also started walking again and I’m planning on doing something exercise-wise every day, whether it be exercise bike, walking or maybe an aerobics class or two. I’m hoping on losing 5 kilos in the next 8 weeks so that I can eat some uberly yummy food in Japan without worrying about whether I’m going to fit into my clothes on my return. Motivation? I haz it.
I’ve been feeling somewhat stressed for a few weeks now and that has lead me down the binge path. I’m not exactly sure why I’m stressed or what I can do to change the way I feel, but I do know I need to stop stuffing my face in an effort to feel better.
Food and I have an interesting relationship. I find eating – and specifically the sensation of food in my mouth to be really comforting and familiar. When I’m stressed, I immediately turn to food because it’s the one constant in my life and provides me with instant gratification. In effect, it’s the perfect band aid to put on my festering wounds.
I think the Japan trip itself is actually making me uberly stressed. There are just too many variables and choices and when I ask Master the 101 questions I need to make some sort of a decision, his response is,
“I don’t care, I just want a bed and some good seafood.”
Which, for some people, might be the most stress-free response they can get, but for me, it just sends me into a worry spiral as it’s like I’m suddenly being thrust into the driver’s seat with a slightly vocal passenger in the back.
I think if I was your average tourist with a guide-book in hand, things would be easier as I would have limited choices, but since I have infinite resources in two languages at my disposal as well as minions in Japan to do my bidding, it’s all too much.
Someone just hand me a packet of tim tams and a tub of English Toffee icecream, please?