Sometimes I feel my bedroom should be featured on the discovery channel. Not only does it contain a plethora of habitats from mountainous piles of clothing to a jungle of shoes, but it also harbours a diverse selection of wildlife.
I was laying in bed on Tuesday night tossing and turning as I tried in vain to get to sleep. It was hot and stuffy so I had decided to sleep naked. After watching several episodes of SaTC on my iPod and finally managing to drift off to sleep, I was woken up not long after by the pitter-patter of tiny feet across my chest.
Once my sleep-fogged brain registered that the pitter-patter of little feet was not something I was supposed to be feeling in the middle of the night on my naked body, I frantically brushed whatever the hell it was off my chest and switched my bedside light on to see what who the offender was.
And I came face to face with a cockroach.
I scooped it up in a dirty sock that was floating in the bed-adjacent swamp of crap, tied a knot in the top so it couldn’t escape and settled down to get back to sleep.
Then the buzzing started.
The nearby swamp of crap habitat while being handy for dumping crap when the bed habitat is over-flowing, is also unfortunately a breeding ground for mosquitos (actually the mosquitos make their way into the house through the gap in the doggie door, but just for the purposes of the discovery channel metaphor, I’m going to go with it…)
I pulled the covers over my body and just had my nose sticking out so I could breathe. Being that it was hot, the situation was not conducive to sleep but I figured it was better than being bitten and in pain and still not being able to sleep.
So that was my night in the wild kingdom that is my bedroom. Do you think maybe someone is trying to tell me I should clean my room?