These feet were made for worshipping…

…and that’s just what slaves do!

It’s always refreshing to start a post with a bit of slave humour, isn’t it?

My apologies for leaving everything in the lurch and disappearing for several days. I’ve been ill with some dreaded virus-cold-thing that turned me into the snot monster. I swear every time I get sick I’m just amazed with the amount of snot that my body produces. I mean, if my body can make something that gross, that quickly, in such ridiculous amounts, you’d think it could be a bit obliging and do something that is actually productive like speed up the old metabolism or something, but alas no.

So I’m sort of alive – thanks to the wonderful medications available over the counter with a driver’s license and a signed declaration that I’m not a drug dealer.

Yay.

Remember that collar-coming-off-and-are-M-and-I-going-to-break-up-and-that-chick-spends-way-too-much-time-in-her-head-because-even-M-doesn’t-understand-her-blogs thing that I had going on? Well, it’s been solved.

Sort of.

There was a long discussion one afternoon a few days ago that involved several apologies, several realisations and several cases of really smelly gas being let off under the bed covers (because it was a really long discussion and we’d had beans the night before). As a result of that conversation we’ve decided to continue on our current path – with several course corrections and a bit of getting back to basics stuff.

I came to the realisation that because I’m an all or nothing girlie, if I’m not getting all the kit and caboodle associated with being a slave, then I’ve got no choice but to reject it. Well, not ‘reject’ it per se, maybe I was trying to force it all down into a space deep inside where I wouldn’t have to deal with little dribs and drabs of it. You know when you just get a tiny little bit of something good and it makes the cravings even worse? Yeah, well let me just say that I’m not satiated with minute rations of anything

M came to the realisation that I need a certain level of slave stuff in my life in order for me to justify to myself that I’m a slave. He also came to the conclusion that treating me as anything else is confusing and while a bit of spoiling and pampering is fine, too much is a bad thing. I came to the realisation that sometimes it’s hard for the owner to get into the right headspace too, so more using of the term “Master” instead of the usual “Sweetie-pumpkin-pie” is prudent – as is following the rules as set by said owner.

We both came to the conclusion that talking is good and that just because something is written in a blog for all to see, doesn’t mean that the person whom it is actually intended for understands what is written there. We also learned that not everything written in a blog is an expression of angst and moaning, but that it can actually be a cry for help of sorts.

There obviously was a lot more to the conversation, but that’s the gist of it for now (with a little bit of bonus bean-gas talk.)

So we’re sort of back into that Master/slave thing, but I’m not wearing the collar around my neck yet. Apparently it will go on at a later date. At the moment I’m thinking of the neck collar as a bit of a symbolic renewed commitment towards each other so I agree that neither of us is quite ready for that yet. We need to ease back into things and make sure that after spending so long on one side of the pendulum, that we find a happy balance in the middle instead of swinging back totally to the other extreme.

And that’s where we’re at.

I’ve done a lot of soul-searching and wandering around in the dark these past couple of weeks and it’s been….productive??….in the sense that I think it’s always good to re-evaluate your life and make sure that you’re heading in the direction that benefits you the most.

As they say, the unexplored life is not worth living.

Next time though, can someone send me a GPS?

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16 thoughts on “These feet were made for worshipping…”

  1. yay! glad to hear that you both sorted stuff out πŸ™‚

    and slave/sub/whatever you are, you are one hell of a funny writer! heh.

    bean-gas *snort*

  2. Great news. It’s always good when progress is made, regardless of where that leads you. Feeling only half slave is something I can certainly relate to, I hope it improves for you.

    1. If you ever find someone who feels ‘all slave’, all the time, can you drop me a line? I want to know if these mythical creatures actually exist πŸ˜‰

  3. Little detours on the road are healthy for any relationship.

    Just remember keep up the communication on both ends.

    I wish you well.
    Rarius

    1. That’s what I think too. I also think it’s a good sign that we’re both willing to try and sort things out instead of throwing in the towel at the first sign of trouble πŸ™‚

    1. (comp keeps eating my comment so I’ll try in bits, maybe it was too long)

      I felt compelled to ask a few questions here now you’ve gone back on the road towards slavery, I hope you will feel like answering them.

      Why after all this do you feel like being a slave and not whatever type of submissive you turn out to naturally be?

      If your answer is no longer “to feel wanted” is it the endurance thing? Is life simpler as a slave? Has it ever made you truly happy?

      If you really desire to be a slave, why this master? What is your motivation for continuing to choose him.

      1. Are you really sexually attracted to this man?

        My reason for asking that is because my own motivations for feeling submissive to a man totally rely on his sexual and personal appeal to me. Which is what gives him the power over me and gives the sparks needed. I can like someone to death and he can treat me like a sub all he wants but that isn’t going to make me feel like kneeling.

        Will your sexual life be improving? So far you seemed okay with separating his from yours but I might see how his wordporn might be turning you off immensely when in bed with him. Are solo orgasms enough for the rest of your life? And if they are is that just because you have issues with letting go in front of others or has it become a kink of sorts? Would you like it to change in time(for the better, however scary that is)?

        I must admit that in this episode the line “how’s that orgasm denial working out for ya” towards your man has been running through my head. Though it isn’t just orgasms I am talking about. I feel like the matingbond is made strong and true by enjoyable sexual activity together regardless of orgasms.

        Plus the sexual power over his mate is part of what I find admirable in a man. And not the one she just gives him, like free sex whenever. The one she cannot deny him because of his skill and personality.

        Skills on any other level also attract me to men. Part of why “Masters” often don’t register on the Dom scale for me is because they often enjoy pulling the slave card for stuff they can easily do themselves. While his self sufficiency and fairness is what turns me on. (the sex if you load the dishwasher without being asked housewifestory is so true)

        The “you wear the shiney thing” type of mastering would always make me feel resentful.

        Is treating you like a slave and you acting like a slave going to make you feel content being a/his slave?

        1. (having trouble posting this, wordpress is very strange)

          Has this method worked before?

          There are probably still a lot of questions in my head but this was plenty I’m sure.

          Oh and I’m also sure they follow a tone but that’s just from my own standpoints being so different. Not because I’m following the U*u campaign, plus if your life was roses from now on what the hell am I going to read right?

          Though I do love the japanese tidbits. If you ever write a book on living in japan…

      2. Sorry about your comments ending up in my spam box. If you use the “secret word” they automatically go for screening πŸ™‚

        Thank you for the questions. Obviously you’ve been reading me for a while and have been wondering about certain things. I’ll endeavour to answer as much as I can, but there are some things I won’t go into for my own reasons.

        I’ve often thought about writing a book about Japan but there are already so many similar books out there that it would be the equivalent of yet another vampire story…lol

        1. Yeah, I thought maybe you were screening all of them but then someone else’s showed up so I thought it might be just the comp acting up.

          Sorry for the zillion messages in your spambox while I was trying. I guess until I *** the word.

          I have been reading you for a long while and I realise you have answered quite a few of the questions in some way regularly but at this point I thought a revision might help me (/us) understand your choice.

          What you choose to keep private is fine, though I hope it is nothing that is a swept under the rug item that might be trouble later.

          Yet even vampire stories suddenly get hyped, look at the sappy Twilight. Or the simple wizard story of Harry Potter. But biographies are not going to be bestsellers anyway but might still be an amusing read. And these days producing a book isn’t beyond the hobby budget, just the commercial distribution might be if you are going for profit.

          But only do it for fun ofcourse.

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