Emails in the life of kitten

First thing this morning I get this email from the man:

Sweetie

 Hope your core body temperature didn’t drop off too much for your walk this morning

 A blog for your morning coffee at the office

 Enjoy your day at work

 If you do get home early after, lighting the fire and sorting out your dinner issues, if you get a chance can you put on the ankle and wrist chain set, after you made sure the keys are found for it so l can release you and also have your small butt plug washed and ready for use after your dinner, also you will be spending an hour in the cage tonight so make sure it has a pillow and doona inside for you as well.

 M

I think I was enjoying that email right up until I got to the last paragraph and saw the word ‘butt plug’ (or is that two words?)

I don’t think I’ll ever overcome my loathing for hard immovable lumps of plastic up my ass so I guess I’m just going to have to learn to live with it.

But I guess things could be worse…I could be wearing one of these t-shirts to celebrate the appointment of a new prime minister in Japan:

My afternoon was filled with some more email:

Pumpkin.
  
Just entered the Old Gold chocolate competition to win trip to Italy. Scored myself a free block of chocolate too. First 7000 entries get free chocolate.

xx

 Sweetie

 Pity you can’t eat chocolate as it won’t fit into your slave bowl

M

 Honeybunch,

What about if the chocolate bar is broken up into pieces??
 
xx

 Sweetie

 The only thing your bowl can fit inside it is food designed to achieve and maintain your slave weight goal of 55 kilo +- or – 3 kilo, l don’t see chocolate on the approved list of foods and therefore it doesn’t fit, neither does ice cream.

 You may be hand fed a chocolate treat from time to time as a reward for being good obedient and pleasing but only when l am in the mood to spoil you or l am rewarding you for some nice nakedness and boots and oral service

 You are now a slave and as such shouldn’t be expecting chocolate in your bowl with any sort of regularity

M

See, I just knew my day was going to go downhill since it began with butt plugs…

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