Where is your cervix???

I have to say, I never expected that particular question to come out of my doctor’s mouth when I went in for my bi-annual pap smear today.

Why does your vaginal area look like a scrap metal yard? I would not be surprised by.

But Where is your cervix? kind of blew me away.

It was kind of funny though…in retrospect.

Apparently my cervix is not where it is supposed to be and is very much to the right.

I have a rightie.


Come to think of it, the rest of me seems to lean to the right as well…as Mr. Gonzo will no doubt testify.

And just in case you were wondering, it wasn’t my regular doctor who did it and therefore both of the above questions were asked and summarily answered.

In domestic goddess news, I made Starbuck’s-style blueberry scones from a Japanese recipe I found on the net and they’re close to what you can buy in Japan, but no cigar. I think they need slightly more sugar and perhaps some vanilla essence. Texture-wise they were quite delish though:

In Japan they’re called scones. In Australia we’d call them rock cakes more so than scones because they’re harder than scones and in the States they’d probably be biscuits – or would they still be classed as scones?

Anyway, next on my target list is melon bread. Have oven, will cook.

In new-gadgets-entering-the-house news, I bought myself a new phone (sorry Chloe, it’s not an iPhone…) I haven’t had a new mobile in almost five years so I even though I really don’t use my mobile as anything other than a wristwatch & an alarm clock, I bought a slider touch screen with a keyboard just so I’d be in with all the cool kids.

After using it for 24hrs, I’ve discovered that it’s going to be excellent incentive to keep growing my fingernails because the keys are teeny tiny and I without them my texts turn into something that looks like it was written by an angry Russian. Here’s my baby:

I was also drastically disappointed by the instruction manual because it’s like a tiny brochure of about 20 pages. I need a thick, chunky volume of several hundred pages to understand this sucker. I guess the Korean version is slightly more voluminous, so looks like my Korean language skills need to expand beyond 안녕하세요

In I’m-a-sucker-for-punishment news, I went into my old uni library and borrowed some books on translation theory so I can brush up my translation skills for a test later on in the year. I don’t really need to go back to basics and I’m probably better just doing reams of practise translations, but I’m anal about these things so I figure some foundation stuff again can’t hurt. It’s always so funny that while I’m studying something I loathe it with a passion, but when I’m not studying something and after a break long enough for all the horrifying memories of studying to fade, I want to get back to studying.

I really would like to do a Masters, but what I want to do is only offered at universities in other states and is not offered through correspondence. But then again, I’m positive I’m only saying that now only precisely because I’m not studying.

In what-we’re-doing-tonight news, we’re apparently going out tonight to a kinky coffee night which is (a) good, because it means I get out of a night of butt-plug & nipple clamp wearing and (b) bad, because I’ll probably have to do something as equally as humiliating or uncomfortable as butt-plug & nipple clamp wearing when we get there.

Ah, the life of a slave is never easy.


4 thoughts on “Where is your cervix???

Add yours

  1. I had a new Dr once tell me he couldn’t find my cervix, which was odd as no other Dr had had problems in the past. Nor had my gyno. I realised soon enough this Dr was just a creepy bastard who was copping a feel and making up lost cervix stories.

    The next time I went I said I did NOT want to see him and the receptionist gave me the ‘I understand why look’. You sure yours wasn’t copping a feel?

    I don’t know why M wouldn’t make you wear a butt plug out to the coffee night. *snickers*

    You are a sucker for punishment re: the translation test, but I say GO FOR IT!!! 🙂

    1. Lol…I hope that she wasn’t trying to cop a feel because…well, she was a girlie and that would be kind of wrong 🙂

      I wouldn’t say I’m a sucker for punishment as far as the test goes – because I really like tests! I think I have Japanese blood in me somewhere…

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