Out with the old, in with the new

I’d been really hanging out for 2012. So welcome new year, come on down!

2011 was pretty abortive for me. I’m trying to think of a really good name for it – something like, “The Lost Year” or “The Twilight Year” because “The Year that Really Fucking Sucked” doesn’t have the best ring to it. Any thoughts? I might just stick with FUBAR2011 until my creative juices kick in.

FUBAR2011 was a year where I achieved nothing, got no-where and did nothing other than gain 20kg and aggravate my carpal tunnel by playing too much WoW. In short, FUBAR.

Incidentally, it was also the year during which I learned to loathe my job, hate Perth even more than I did before and generally just not be very happy.

That’s why I’m ready for it to be over and start afresh.

2012 just has to be better, doesn’t it? I mean, as long as the end of the world doesn’t come, we should still come out on top shouldn’t we??

As always, I’m going to make myself some resolutions. Along with the typical lose weight and exercise more, I’m also going to make it my resolution to get happy.

There used to be a guy who took my bus every morning who was obviously going through some sort of crisis. Every morning he was reading a self-help title that would change every few weeks and I used to snigger at him quietly to myself. He worked his way through titles that made me question whether he was an avid Oprah fan; The Secret,  7 Habits of Highly Effective People and, of course, Chicken Soup for the Soul. Now I’m thinking maybe he was on to something. Maybe he found some wisdom within the pages of those books that made life just that little bit more bearable.

Maybe, just maybe, he even found the answer.

My blogging has been pretty sparse in recent months. There’s been a part of me that felt I had nothing worth sharing. There was also a part of me that just didn’t want to replay my unhappiness.

I’m earning enough money to pay the bills and live reasonably comfortably, I’m not in physical pain, relationship-wise things are fine.

I’m just a bit lost.

I’m a fairly (read: very) target-orientated person. I have to always be doing something for a purpose – in order to get somewhere. At the moment, I just don’t know what I’m doing. I haven’t got anywhere to go or anything to get. I just ‘am’.

Over Christmas I was thinking about getting myself some Lego. Yes people, Lego. I wanted to make something, build something, have something to ‘do’, a target to reach. That was until I discovered the 10,000 piece Star Wars Death Star set I wanted would set me back about $800.

$800!!!

It’s bits of coloured plastic, not a fucking iPad (which is incidentally what I would buy if I had a spare $800…even though the Death Star is very cool…)

Now I’m three-quarters of the way through this blog and I’m lost again. What the hell am I writing about? I have got no idea what I’m trying to say or why I’m even writing about it.

Anyway, what I guess I’m trying to explain is what has been happening over the past couple of months. Believe you me, you haven’t missed anything. I’ve quite literally been going to work, eating, sleeping and playing WoW. That’s it.

2012. Will you be any better?

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5 thoughts on “Out with the old, in with the new

Add yours

  1. Your “nothing to say” is better than most people’s blabber. I always look forward to your posts and find inspiration. If I had your writing talent, I would compile those old blog posts into a book, add some new musings and real but somewhat extreme expiriences and sell it as an e-book. You don’t need an editor because you can dance circles around him/her. I know there are books out there that explain BDSM and D/s but they are too technical. I’d be first in line to download yours. I’m certain I wouldn’t be the only one. Your musings have allowed me to accept my feelings and have made it possible for my boyfriend to find his inner Dom. I thank you for that. amy

  2. i second what amy said – it’s just great to read you again…

    sorry to hear you’ve been feeling so flat 😦

    I know the job is a pain in the arse – maybe keep an eye out for something new in that area? M is still looking for work back east, so why not you too? I mean, if you’re the breadwinner now don’t you get to call those shots too? (or is it that he is more likely to be offered a relocation package, coz moving is a bitch on the savings…)

    I hope 2012 brings you everything your heart desires, so be careful what you wish for 😉

    weirdgirl

  3. You say you are not in physical pain. You say you make enough to live comfortably. You have a blog that people actually enjoy reading and comment on. My god, you are fortunate! Right now my husband is at a job that is treating him like shit. He is bringing home very little of what he was making before because they are not giving him what he is due. We are just barely making it. I am working about 5 online jobs from home and juggling them. I am soooo grateful to have them. I am on cancer meds that made me relapse with an eating disorder when it made me gain 30 pounds in 3 months. I am now starving myself because that scared me so bad. I have to be on the cancer meds for 3 more years. Thankfully, I have lost 19 of those 30 pounds. It is near impossible to lose on this medication.

    My point to all this woe is me crap is that you have your health and you are making it financially and you have people reading your blog and missing you when you don’t blog. I am truly happy for you. I, obviously, have some things to work through in my life. LOL! I am grateful to have what I have in my life too.You have a blog that people listen to!! That is so cool!! You are one lucky person.

  4. I’ve been lurking on your blog for a couple years I think, and miss you when you’re not blogging. I love your Japan series and the Running series and reading your adventures. My 2011 was kind of a blargh year too, and I’m with you in finding the happy in 2012. I’d challenge you to train for a race (misery loves company?) but having just had my first run of 2012, um, just hoping you find a great 2012.

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