Agony aunt

It seems many people who come to my blog, come to gain answers to the burning questions they have inside.

Burning questions such as, “How does one talk dirty to a masochist?” In answer to this, might I humbly suggest such things as,

I want you to wear my ring…and I don’t mean on your finger!

or

I love nine inch nails…through your tits!

As for the names of the girls doing the grinder at sexpo, we’ll it’s been approximately 4 years since I last went to sexpo and I found it a big yawn fest so you’re asking the wrong person. And in case you don’t know what sexpo is, think about an expo for newly awakened people who have just read Fifty Shades of Grey and are titilated by a guy drawing pictures with his cock and you’ll have a rough idea.

How to suck cock if you’re underage and homeschooled?? Well, I don’t even know what advice to give except, if you’re Amish, wait for your Rumspringa and then the world is your oyster.

“In houchi play do you see the girls naked?” Well, that depends on how houchi you get. The idea of houchi play is to leave someone in a public place in a predicament. It could be naked, it could be dressed up as something embarassing or you could even leave them in handcuffs somewhere.

And finally, I wouldn’t recommend using a stilleto as a gag…for one, drool is a bitch to get off shoes – so too is cum (just in case you were wondering…) and secondly, the only things that truly gag are tape over the mouth and a wad of cloth in the mouth. To stop noise you’ve got to cut off all air and that’s not very safe, so don’t even bother. If you want to give them something to chew on, how about some jerky?

Mmmm…jerky.

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2 thoughts on “Agony aunt

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  1. I’ve seen that guy who draws with his cock, I think his name is Tim, I could be wrong.
    I saw him at Libertine and he was quite good oddly enough. LOL

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