So, we were in pre-sleep banter time last night and we were discussing the day I owed him after losing a stupid bet. The bet involved me dressing and doing what he wanted for a day if he won. He’d been telling there would be multiple pairs of boots and some ‘barely there’ outfits. I pointed out to him that that wardrobe probably wouldn’t be appropriate for his mistress and that it would be decidedly slavish, to which he said,

“Well, you’ve already told the world.”

And that’s the problem with having a blog that he reads. I can’t ‘fess up to anything without him knowing too.

You’re probably thinking at this point that it is fairly important that he knows of my recent decision and it’s pretty crap of me for announcing that kind of drama on my blog – to the whole world, I might add – before I’d discussed it with him. And you’d be right. But that’s how I roll.

Because having a direct discussion about that stuff with my slave/Master/whatever the fuck he is now is way too scary. What if he doesn’t want to put the shoe back on the other foot? What if he wants to stay as the submissive one in this relationship?

I can just see us having a fight,

“No, you tie me up! No, you tie me up!!”

“No, I’m the slave! No, I’m the slave!!”

That would be some great comic material for a sit-com.

In bed last night he also asked that oh-so-familar question:

What are you?

I hmmmmed and hrrrred and tried to be all cute dodging the question for a while, before finally answering that I thought I was on the submissive side of the fence. And I’m not sure whether it was that thought that excited him or the thought of a day with multiple pairs of boots, but whatever it was, it resulted in a prompt “climax” to our banter time.

To be honest, I’m not even sure how you would have a conversation about the future of your relationship. Would you just come right out and ask,

“So, do you want to be the slave or shall I be?”

There’s got to be some sort of a better way to work this shit out. Flipping a coin? Rock-scissors-paper-lizard-Spock?



6 thoughts on “Awkward

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    1. I’ve read a blog or two written by switch couples and I find it to be an interesting concept. I’m sure you know that I used to be ‘against’ the idea of switching – I just couldn’t wrap my head around it – but my thinking has changed/is changing and I’m beginning to understand that there are all sorts of ways to do this stuff.

  1. i had a hard time getting my head around switching too. i swore blind i could never do it, never say never i guess lol but i think as life goes on we change in how we see things and that light bulb goes off.

    1. Me too! I wrote many a blog about how switching was something I could *never* do…lol. I agree – we are constantly evolving and our thinking changes as we do.

  2. i’m fascinated by how the switch thing works alongside moods and emotional needs etc…like what if you BOTH feel submissive at the same time??? Sounds like a tough balance to crack.

    1. So you know how sometimes a domly one can annoy you so much that you want to beat their arse but you still swear blind you’re a submissive? Well, welcome to the world of switching 🙂 If you both feel submissive, one of you just has to suck it up and give the other what they need/want and you play a role to provide that service. Then hopefully the favour will be returned to you at some other time. That’s what I would define as “active” switching. I would probably find that type of switching tough though.

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