I came to two realisations

(1) I suck at pushups

(2) I have a leftie

The first realisation came after spending copious amount of time on youtube looking at pushup technique (I may have also accidentally clicked through to fail videos, which lead to speed painting which lead to dogs in tights and I lost several hours there but, you know, I was there for the technique!)

The second realisation came when I was de-hairing my snatch and I noticed that my girlie bits naturally like to lean to the left. Then I was wondering if it was because of how my rings are placed and that maybe they pull to the left…has anyone else noticed that their bits like to hang out on a particular side?

And just a little bit more tmi, while I was down there I noticed reason #87 of why long hair can sometimes be a pain in the ass; along with hair in your butt crack, I also get hair stuck around my piercings. And by hair, I mean hair from my head. There was this one strand that was wound really tightly around one end of my clithood piercing and the hair had then passed up through the hole and was also wound around the base of the ball on the other end. I had to get in there with a pair of eyebrow scissors and really, really carefully cut it off. Who knew such shit could happen??

I received a paddling yesterday for slave fail #(I’ve lost count…) and I also spent several hours in boots and cuffs on the floor while he randomly cropped my ass (mostly during commercial breaks…lol.) There was one particular stroke where I was kneeling with my head to the floor and the crop landed between my butt cheeks and on my recently chemically de-haired pussy and omfg…I wanted to choke him then and there. It’s funny how those ridiculously painful, did-you-really-mean-to-do-that?? strokes just drive me from my usually chilling out self, to complete and irrational anger in 0.003 seconds.

I’m into week 3 of Japanese client visits and I really need to compile a list of the funny questions they ask. Some of my favourites so far have been:

(while viewing some wild kangaroos in a random paddock) How do they get over the fence?

Why don’t you have Thanksgiving in Australia?

(while stuck in cross-city traffic) Where are the koalas?

(while looking at a horse wearing a fly mask over its eyes) Oh my god, is that horse blind??

Yeah…5 weeks of visits to go! Then I can crawl back into my non-social hole and relax.

australia-map-meme

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