Finishing up

…No Excuses November, that is (you thought I was going to say my blog, didn’t you? Hehehe…yeah, no…you’re still stuck with me.)

I missed 4 days of exercise in total. 2 were due to work and the others were just days where I could.not.be.bothered. That’s not really in keeping with NEN, but yeah…I fail too.

So that was 23 gym sessions and 3 long walks in 30 days. That’s nothing compared to my gym-going peak of 15 sessions a week…or my more recent 7 sessions a week thing, but it’s not too bad.

In keeping with my short attention span, I’m now done with enforced exercising and from tomorrow I’ll be starting Don’t Put It In Your Mouth December. That’s basically my plan to stop shovelling food into my mouth and do some mindful eating and good eating.

For the last ten days I’ve been waking up with stiff fingers, along the lines of not being able to bend them and they take about an hour to warm up before I can make a fist. My friend google tells me that it’s probably rheumatoid arthritis or possibly carpal tunnel. I’m hoping it’s the latter as having arthritis, particularly of the rheumatoid variety, at 37 would really suck.

Carpal tunnel is always a real and present danger for me as I spend all day at work on my computer and then I come home and spend hours on my laptop doing my story. I was thinking about the story the other day as I was languishing in the depths of writer’s block and having a “FUUUUUKKKK I’M SO UNINSPIRED!!” moment (I have a lot of those…) I was thinking that churning out a chapter every week is like having to write an essay every week for 15-20 weeks straight except you’ve got no topic, no research materials to help you and no crib notes.

Well, actually, I do have some research materials to help me. As I’ve said before I have a really funky browser history that includes such things as waterboarding, removing someone’s skin with powertools and psychological torture. I’m expecting ASIO (Australia’s equivalent of Homeland Security) to knock on my door one of these days. I’ve been down in the storage room looking at M’s powertools a lot recently as well. I think our neighbours also think I have a mental disorder…or a powertool fetish.

Anyway, I’ll be monitoring the finger situation and heading off to the doctor if the situation doesn’t improve.

The general malaise I’ve been feeling is still continuing except I’ve recently found some music to inspire me and I’ve been listening to a lot of Sia. I had no idea she was Australian! Lol…how embarrassing. That girl can certainly sing and when you pump up the volume and dance around the house in your underwear everything feels okay in the world.

Last week I also received an unsolicited copy of what is apparently “Australia’s Largest Holistic Magazine”, Living Now in my mailbox (is the universe trying to tell me something?)

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You’ll notice it includes such interesting articles as, “Why does chanting work?” and “How to change the world by being a neo-capitalist”. I shit you not.

Created with Nokia Smart Cam

The bearded gentleman on the cover appears to be happy anyway, so maybe he’s onto something (or maybe he’s just smiling about being in a tantric relationship.)

Just between you and me, while I often scoff at transpersonal healing and other such topics, there’s a part of me that thinks it would be life-changing to run off to an ashram in India or go chant with some monks in Nepal. Maybe one day I’ll do it.

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9 thoughts on “Finishing up

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  1. I think I mentioned it before, but Vipassana is totally awesome and FREE – always a bonus! Oh and have you tried dictation software for your home-based writing? I have used Dragon Naturally Speaking for essays in the past, when I’ve been struggling to get past writer’s block. I tend to get caught up in each word choice when I should be getting the ideas out, and I find it helps for that. You can train it to pick up your intonations and accent, and train it to know all your…ahem…more unusual word choices. 😉
    Well done on NEN, and good luck with the December challenge (I take it it’s only up to and not including the festive season? lol)
    So glad you’re not finishing up your blog! 😀

    1. Was Vipassana guru-ish? (I’m wondering if it might be like my experience with hypnotherapy…I had a lack of believing, I think.)
      I haven’t tried dictation software but I have given it a serious thought. I get stuck on words too and can spend a good hour angsting about a word instead of JUST.GETTING.IT.DOWN.ON.THE.GOD.DAMN.PAPER.
      December challenge…umm…I’ll have a few days off for chrissy of course.

  2. Vipassana is only guru-ish in the fact that it is delivered by the same video and audio of Goenka all over the world. He died in 2013, but the videos are like 80s anyway, and they’ve always done it that way and say they always will. They ask that while you are there for the 10 days that you don’t use any other meditation techniques or prayer or anything like that, and I reckon that’s fair enough. I mean if you are sick and you try 3 medicines at once, how will you know which one works? It’s a secular meditation technique based on Buddhist teachings, and the 10 day silence and it being free etc is all to do with making as close to a monastic experience as possible – so for example you are grateful for whatever food you get, rather than wondering whether you are getting value for money etc. It’s also a way of pushing through all the shit our minds throw at us in the name of distraction. If you can get beyond that you actually can experience that everything, every sensation etc is impermanent. It’s about experiencing impermanence first hand in a really direct way. I found it incredibly challenging, and didn’t get any of the woo-woo epiphanies some people speak of afterwards, but it certainly helped me a lot to get my (very severe) anxieties and OCD under control.
    if you’re after a *quicker* version, my partner had a similar outcome after travelling to Peru and doing ayahuasca with a shaman in the Amazon (Although I hear you can do it at Byron Bay too (of course. *eyeroll*) 😀

    As for the Dragon Naturally Speaking, you can get the app for free for your phone (and maybe tablet too) to trial it before taking the plunge to purchase the full program for your PC.

    I hope we can meet some day Kitten, I reckon we’d yabber away for hours. And then eat! 😀

    1. 10 days of silence? I think I could totally do that! What I think would kill me would be the ten days without internet. I will be over Byron Bay way at Christmas time (kind of…) but I’m guessing the silly season may not be the best time to get all monastic. On a serious note though, thank you for all your input and advice. I keep thinking that now that I’m older I should have ‘grown out’ of all the anxiety and stuff, but I actually think it had gotten/is getting worse. I’m much less willing to do ‘scary’ things that push my boundaries and hiding at home is much more appealing.
      I’m definitely going to try the DNS app. My poor wrists need a break!
      I’m not sure how people who meet me in real life react to the real me. I’ve only ever met one person who started out reading my blog and then met me for the first time about six months ago. I think they mentioned that I was a bit shy! Lol…
      There would definitely be eating!

      1. My anxiety worsened with age too (I’ve got quite a few years on you!) but I found out I was peri-menopausal at 40 (and probably had been for a couple of years) and since being prescribed a progesterone cream most of my symptoms including the severity of my anxiety have decreased. That, in combo with the meditation seems to be working ok at this point, and I feel a whole heap better. My partner appreciates it too! 😉
        The silly season Vipassana courses are usually the first to fill up! So many people want desperately to escape all the family dramas i guess 😉

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